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Thanks Healing

After reading One Thousand Gifts, a description of my own transformation:

I was born blind.  Fear covered my eyes like scaled cataracts and I was afraid to walk, afraid to move without feeling along the walls with my hands, my toes searching the road for the unknown.  Timid.  Closed.  Light shut up in empty eyes.

I am blind but oh, my voice has never been mute.  I project from deep within, crying, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me, a sinner!” Louder.  “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me, a sinner!” No one can silence me:  “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”  I am not afraid of desperation, not afraid of what I am.  That I know too well.   I am blindness and sin wound tight:  Unholy Cocoon.

He raised his hands to my eyes.  Through this discipline of thanks, He proclaims healing and it is spreading through my eyes and Joy begins to spread.

My little girl giggles, climbs into the sky, pumping her legs on the backyard swing and I weep healing.  Beauty smacks.  I am looking, searching even, but it still smacks surprise and I weep healing, scales falling.  The tenderness in that woman’s eyes, the peace of a cool coffee shop to write, the call of a mother/friend watching all this in awe…and I weep healing.  Thankful, so very thank-full.

I walk forward, joy weeping, healing spreading and I am no longer afraid.  You are here in the Now, glory spreading out and then Step, You are here, and Step, You are here…and again, more glory, more Presence in the Now.    I am beginning to trust God’s Presence, beginning to trust You.  I am sure there were times that the Israelites had to wander with Manna in their pockets and that is what I feel I am doing: Walking with Presence, sustenance, You.

I am aging backwards.

 

Eucharisteo:

For a little boy’s kiss on the cheek after climbing up into my bed

Husband’s squeeze of shoulders, encouragement

A surrogate grandmother/babysitter who laughs deep

Words that tumble and play and roughhouse.  Pure Joy.

Half hour on top bunk reading before bed, boy/man enraptured

Word of God Revealing, Spirit speaking.  Hasn’t stopped.  Ever.

I am starting to Listen.

A thank-full Summer Gross

What are you thankful for today, friend?

Anglican priest, spiritual director, homeschool mom of three and still in love with my high school sweetheart. I love listening to your hard and holy stories and setting the table for you to spend time in the Presence of God. My mission? Giving you tools to go from anxious to resting in God.

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