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Day 21: Self-Acceptance and the Mysteries of Grief

The last few months I have been living the stages of grief, swerving from anger to depression and back again, barely catching my breath. I only momentarily live in the broad open spaces of acceptance before being pulled back into the vortex. …

Searching for Resurrection

Crabapple trees in pink frills process down my new street. All winter I wondered what color they would wear. Their miniature crabapples  fell onto the sidewalks and gave the early robins something to eat in the cold. Still, they kept their secret.…

Advent: Day 1, Leaning into Longing

We married in the dark candlelight of December.  Flurries swirled on Kenyon College’s campus and we hurried into the stone church holding all our hopes for our future. We were crazy young: 18 and 20. We turned toward each other, said…

Serious Approval Addiction Excavation

So God has his working gloves on.  Really, we both do, shovels in hand.  We’re working around the dead shrubs planted in the front yard of my life… my people pleasing addiction. And friend, this baby has roots that go…

Prayers Watered, Answered, Savored

Dear friends we are in the process of scrubbing our house for renters and interviewing at a new parish but even in chaos I still need to take up this journal and write words, black on white to make sense of my life.  Thank…

Psalm 23: Learning to Slow and Rest

Andrew’s retreating with a fly rod in hand and I’m cocooned in the love of family and this week we are resting. a lot.  This is a republished post from last year after Easter which I reread often…maybe it will…

He is risen! Happy Easter Friends

The baskets are stuffed, the Easter outfits laid out on the dining room floor, and the lily’s perfume fills the living room where I am sitting.  Quiet.   Quiet is pure gift in a clergy person’s home during Holy Week,…

Stephanie’s Bachelorette Party

The Dance She is my sister and she is luminous. I have eyes-wide-open watched as the grave opened. I was witness as the rock was slowly pried open and the white putrid cloth, suffocating life, was unwrapped one slow turn…

Growing Up

This is it.  That sweet anniversary.  My baby’s 3rd birthday and that anniversary of when You were here, so Present. As Present as the red velvet couch I sit on. As pervasive as the yummy bacon smell from the California…

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